Bicultural & Sichuan girls
I don't understand the fuss over the bicultural candidates unveiled by the PAP. My guess is that the ruling party wants MPs who are equally at ease with the cosmopolitan young as well as the predominantly Chinese-speaking older voters. Strangely enough, it is the Straits Times I doubt many older Chinese read that has put more focus on these candidates. My impression is that the Zaobao writers have more of the 'ok, but so what' attitude. I'm too lazy to dig up these articles and reproduce the gist of their contents, so you're gonna have to take my word for it.
As far as I'm concerned, the concept of 'bicultural' seems pretty strange, even though I know what the Government is trying to get at. I've always thought of ourselves as being mostly monocultural, namely Singaporean, regardless of what Amartya Sen says about the complexity of self-identities in modern societies. Using myself as an example: My grasp of Chinese culture is better than most. But I wasn't raised in a monolithic Chinese society and didn't receive a Chinese education. Should I someday be presented with the Four Treasures of the Study Chamber and invited to offer a few wise words at say the opening of a Chinese factory, I would have to decline with some embarrassment. I have forgotten my calligraphy, and I wouldn't know what to say anyway. On the other hand, despite the prodigious amounts of Western culture imbibed via various media, I can hardly say that I strongly identify with it. But in a sense, being neither here nor there is being somewhere. Dunno which candidate said that he hoped someday Singaporean Chinese would converse in English and Chinese at the same level as native speakers. Plainly impossible lor. We are not subatomic particles, can't be in two places at once.
Some candidates were asked about their favourite Chinese novel and character, fictional or otherwise. If I remember correctly, two out of three gave the answers
Romance of the Three Kingdoms and Zhuge Liang respectively. Why do so many people admire Zhuge Liang? For all his military expertise, he had forgotten the most important principles of warfare. He launched unsuccessful campaigns (supposedly seven) more in hope than expectation, otherwise known as 'fighting wars one can't win'. He wasted substantial amounts of material resources and manpower for a small (in terms of population) kingdom. He did not have much of a long-term strategy and failed to put whatever plans he had into action at the opportune time. He served a fatuous ruler. Of course people admire his loyalty and his noble intention to revive the House of Han. But it would be quite a stretch to suggest that generals and courtiers serving the other kingdoms were necessarily less loyal. Also, the legitimacy of the Shu Han throne was very much disputable.
Anyway, the Shu Han kingdom occupied the Ba Shu region. Ba corresponds to modern-day Chongqing, Shu to Chengdu. I have it on reliable authority that on average the prettiest girls in China are to be found in these two cities. Chengdu and Chongqing, despite or because of their proximity, have a bit of a rivalry. Both cities think they have the most captivating girls- physically striking and fiery, like their cuisine. I have been to neither, but I hope to verify the claims for myself someday.
Incidentally, Li Yuchun, the winner of the Super Girl competition, is from Chengdu. Western commentators think that the Super Girl phenomenon reflects inchoate Chinese democracy. I think she is precisely the reason why the Chinese cannot be trusted with the vote. Of China's teeming millions, they pick an androgynous girl who can barely hold a tune. But despite her millions of young female fans, Li Yuchun is not THE phenomenon. Voted first place in some survey and chosen as one of the online personalities of 2005 (I watched the show on TV) is a Qiang (a minority group in Sichuan) girl named Erma Yina, better known as Tianxian MM (Meimei). Her story is too long to be told here, you can Google her to get an idea. She's now the advertising face for ISPs and handphones. Which I think is totally appropriate, cos no matter how ulu a place you find yourself in China (and obviously Erma Yina's hometown is really ulu), the phone reception remains excellent. In Singapore, we go outfield only some of our phones got no bar. Maybe SAF purposely one.
Considering the huge number of non-celebrity MM pics posted on Chinese BBSes, Tianxian MM is perhaps worthy of sociological investigation. If Li Yuchun is admired by young girls for not conforming to traditional notions of Chinese femininity, then Erma Yina has arguably captured public imagination for the opposite reasons from the Super Girl winner. A journalist suggested that Erma Yina corresponds to some ideal of femininity in men that is lamentably rare among city-dwelling women. She is pretty in the conventional sense (though not exceptionally so) and, judging from her interviews and such, sweet, unpretentious, naive and altogether unaccustomed to big city life. Moreover, her minority status adds to the mystique. So when she sheds her ethnic costume and puts on makeup, her appeal is considerably diminished.
A television show that hybridizes the Super Girl and Tianxian MM phenomena will probably crush all rivals in the viewership ratings. I suggest naming it Chao Ji Shao Nü- meaning 'Super Young Girl' or 'Super Minority Girl'. Beauties from various minority groups are to be scouted from all over China and put on a stage in their ethnic costumes, singing whatever songs they know (their vocal ability shouldn't be an issue- have you ever heard a minority girl singing badly?), traditional or otherwise, in a American-Idol style competition. I for one can't wait to watch.
Polling Day
Polling Day on May 6. Opposition are relieved to finally know the date, so am I. PAP has put its election machinery into fifth gear (don't forget some cars have seven gears), and I'm all ready to put my plans into action. No lah, I'm not going to suddenly 'persistently propagate, promote or circulate political issues relating to Singapore' during election period, though that would be kinda fun. Actually I have a question. I live nearer to, and spend more time in, two neighbouring constituencies than the 'central area' of mine. Shouldn't I be more interested in who gets elected in those constituencies, at least with respect to municipal issues and assuming that upgrading is of no concern?
JC student kills himself over size of genitals. Don't blame sex education in schools. Blame porn; either that or his girlfriend. If we blame popular culture for contributing to eating disorders, similarly we should blame porn for boys mistakenly thinking that their penises are too small (of course I'm assuming that his penis is indeed of regular size since his doctor said so). Sure, sure, give me the spiel on body dysmorphic disorder- doesn't change my opinion. I studied this in school, remember? I also suspect that his girlfriend made one too many disparaging remarks while they were revising for their anatomy practicals (these are JC students, what do you think they do in their free time?), e.g. "Darling, you in yet?" or something about 'peanuts'.
CNA very eng, can have programme called 'That Dialogue: Was I Rude Or...'. It's a conspiracy I tell you: a platform for the young ideologues to defend themselves and re-assert their positions, in a contumacious manner I must add, without a minister present to challenge their views and correct their misconceptions. These young people england powderful, talk until ya-ya payaya lidat. But don't forget it's People's Action Party, not People's Talking Party okay?
Dare to ask MM
I neber watch the telecast of the dialogue session with MM Lee, so I cannot be sure if the young journalists were being no big no small to him (edit: watched liao, the journos were disappointing). My impression based on the ST transcript was that they seemed a wee bit over-eager in trying to demonstrate that they (supposedly representative of the under-30 voting group at large) had independent political opinions and were not afraid to voice them. The exchange between MM Lee and Ken Kwek over the electorate's alleged fear of voting against the PAP macham like defamation hearing against opposition politician liddat- not that I've attended one of course heh. In case you didn't watch the telecast or read the transcript, here's my transliterated and abridged version of the conversation:
Ken Kwek: Voters scared to vote against PAP!
MM Lee: Who say one?
KK: We talked to 100 voters in a ST poll. They say one.
MM: (in lawyer mode) Give me some names to prove.
KK: Cannot lah...
MM: Eh, you got ask them personally or not?
KK: Got, we purposely go out and ask one.
MM: How many you ask?
KK: The ST poll got more than 100...
MM: I said, how many you ask personally!
KK: Er... about 40.
MM: So they told you what they think, what they buay song about?
KK: Yes, we ask them who will win. Some people say hard to say, some say maybe Low Thia Khiang will hang on, some just say better not say...
MM: When some of the 40 say they better not say, you own self think they scared to tell you?
KK: Something like dat....
MM: Eh brother, you are in ST leh! You are 'purveying an unnecessary falsehood'. We already say vote is secret liao. Some more, they never say they were afraid what. They only say they don't want to say, then you go and conclude that voters scared to vote against PAP.
KK: I neber say that!
MM: You think I senile ah? Got tape ok! And you interviewed not 100, but 40. When people don't want to say anything, you assume people scared.
That's why the session was called 'Why my vote matters', not 'Dare to ask MM'. If you dare to ask, then you must be prepared to kena shoot back. MM Lee is lao jiao okay, let young punks anyhow shoot meh?
Chua Mui Hoong is relieved to hear someone, namely R.Adm Lui Tuck Yew, finally use the taboo word 'lead'. No surprise that this comes from a military man. It's a distinctly Nietzschean turn- nascent elites about to exercise the levers of power are often wary of appearing ambitious for fear of alienating a public more comfortable with egalitarian mores, this despite the well-known fact that egalitarianism does not in principle exclude the formation of a governing elite. One ought to humbly serve the public, not lead them self-assuredly. Obviously I have no idea what candidates are really thinking when they declare their desire to serve residents and assist the underprivileged. Maybe some of them think of themselves as little more than glorified estate managers and social workers with the added capacity of posing questions in Parliament. If that's indeed the case, then they probably weren't far off when they said they joined politics to serve. On the other hand, a smaller proportion might believe that they can make a bigger difference by occupying higher office, or in short by exercising leadership. If these people really want to lead, then perhaps it's more appropriate, even advantageous, for them to make clear their intentions on the outset (not an easy task, given the bland banality of the statements newly-unveiled candidates seem required to make). After all, we don't judge our potential ministers and estate managers using the same set of criteria.
Karate & girls' personalities
In case you haven't heard, three Singaporean men got lost and trapped in a snowstorm near the peak of a mountain in Japan last month. They were rescued by a search party after 17 hours. One of them later told the police that he was fulfilling his father's dying wish to obtain a secret manual from a karate master living in Soma Village on the mountain. A local karate sensei, when interviewed by the papers, doubted the existence of this manual and added that these men must have watched one too many wuxia films. "If there really is such a manual, I'd be the first to look for it!"
Actually hor, his logic is flawed. There is a reason why such manuals are secret and semi-mythical. Obviously, whoever wrote or is currently in possession of the manual doesn't want the whole world to come knocking on his door. Then again, I don't see the purpose in learning some super martial arts technique. Last time boh cheng hu, whoever had the most powerful skills ruled the pugilistic world. Nowadays, before you can even practise the skill, ISD ask you to drink kopi already. Your karate faster or Smith & Wesson faster?
Let you in on a little secret. I heard, heard only lah, that last time got one highly-skilled pugilist. But his technique was for self-defence only, which was why nobody was interested in learning it back in those days. He was so powerful nobody in Singapore could even come close to him. Some say even Johor and Batam. He roamed jianghu in search of someone who could succeed in attacking him, but alas in vain. In despair, he retired to Bukit Timah Hill to live out the rest of his days. Amongst his skills were the Shanjian Taiji and Yanli Gong, which could be roughly translated as Siam-arrow Tai-chi and Eye Power respectively. Also got people say that the first skill was actually called Shandian Taiji instead, meaning Escape-thunderbolt (strike) Tai-chi. But I don't believe got so powerful a skill.
Anyway this fella lived and died alone, save for the companionship of a monkey. This monkey, through monkey-see-monkey-do, managed to master the gist of these awesome techniques. Legend goes that this monkey is still alive. But since there are so many monkeys at Bukit Timah, nobody knows which monkey is which. Next time you go trekking there, you might want to observe the monkeys a little more closely.
We perennially gripe about Miss Singapore Universe contestants. And we always say that the really pretty ones never take part in beauty pageants- well at least my mother does. But then hor, we usually fail to consider probablistic baselines. I don't know what proportion of Singaporean girls are taller than say 1.7 m, but I'm guessing that it is probably quite low, maybe 10-15%. Since there's no a priori reason to assume that tall girls tend to be prettier or smarter, we are effectively looking at the best, or supposedly among the best, that this small 1.7 m group has to offer. In any case, we shouldn't expect too much also lah. If they want to say that their dream is to cure cancer or lift entire populations out of poverty, then just let them be lor. If people ask me the same questions, I also don't know what to say without sounding cheeky, cynical or like a PAP candidate.
I don't know why girls like to say that they have outgoing personalities in self-introductions. What's so wonderful about being outgoing? Outgoing means she's more likely to screw a stranger while still technically attached to you. On the other hand, if she says something like "I'm a really shy girl" in some (pseudo) saccharine or demure fashion, more guys might feel strangely drawn to her, whether to test their claws on her flesh or in a protective impulse.
Watched
Kang Yong Dang Jia yesterday. Ruby Lin Xinru, the stand-in host turned interviewee, is put on the spot together with Jimmy Lin Zhiying, her rumoured former beau. Jimmy's friend, (VJ) George Zhang is determined to wring awkward confessions out of them.
George: (to Jimmy) If you see a pretty girl like Xinru for the first time, what would be the first thing that attracts you to her?
Jimmy: Err... her personality.
George: Personality, my foot! The first time you see a girl, you know her personality?!
Vivian Chow is the new spokesperson for Phillip Wain. At the press conference, she insisted that she really is an active and outgoing person, unlike her widely-perceived public image. Does/should anyone care? In the words of my friend, she is, or used to be, the type of person who could just stand there and people would throw money at her. Back when she was active in the entertainment industry, nobody cared if she was two-dimensional, had a feeble singing voice and lousy Mandarin diction (not that I have something against her, in fact I wouldn't mind being against her- physically). She just had to stand there. Personality, my foot!
Singaporeans are stupid pt2
According to Zaobao columnist Yan Mengda, Li Ao merely repeated the opinions of our venerable MM Lee in his own inimitable way. MM Lee had on more than one occasion discussed the differences between Singaporean Chinese and Hongkongers. He said the ancestors of Singaporean Chinese was essentially refugees from Southeast China, and they did not possess much culture. In Chapter 34: Hong Kong's Transition of MM Lee's memoirs
From Third World To First, he writes: "when the communists "liberated" the mainland from 1949, with the influx of some 1-2 million refugees from China had come some of the best entrepreneurs, professionals and intellectuals from Shanghai and the provinces of Zhejiang, Jiangsu and Guangdong. They formed the thick layer of talent that was to transform Hong Kong into one of the most dynamic cities in the world..." He later gives an anecdote about Singaporean managers who are content to work for others, while their Hong Kong counterparts strike out on their own. In the article, Yan Mengda also mentioned that nobody complains when a minister says that Singaporeans lack the service DNA, while we are up in arms over a similar remark about our cultural pedigree.
Admittedly, these are two slightly overlapping but still separate issues- our inability to take risks and poor cultural heritage. Implicit is the argument that risk-taking was a quality our ancestors lacked, which accounts for some of the policies we have today, instead of letting citizens take the initiative. Actually I wonder if there is any particular reason why more enterprising or intellectual individuals would choose to move to Hong Kong rather than Singapore back in those turbulent times. If yes, what and if not, then? There is little doubt that Hongkongers are indeed more dynamic, but it is important to pinpoint the historical reasons why. Maybe the sheer fact that Shanghai and its surrounding areas enjoyed greater economic prosperity (and thus had a greater proportion of educated individuals) than say Fujian in pre-war China accounts for most of the difference between Hongkongers and Singaporean Chinese. If largely true, then what an example of cultural determinism. Oh no, maybe we really are stupid.
Singaporeans are stupid pt1
Li Ao set aside nearly half an hour during his show on Phoenix Channel to clarify and elaborate on his pointed observation that Singaporeans were stupid/gullible. He made the remark last year, but evidently a sufficient number of Singaporeans wrote him in protest that he felt it necessary to revisit the issue. As I recall, the Zaobao forum received a flurry of largely indignant letters back then. The contents were usually of the 'look-at-our-prosperity-how-dare-he-call-us-stupid' variety, but a couple of calmer heads urged us to look at the issue in its due context. Li Ao is well-known for his incisive, even incendiary, comments, frequently couched in dripping sarcasm and just as often half in jest. Moreover, he did throw other unflattering remarks in the faces of the mainland Chinese, Hongkongers and Taiwanese, so nobody was spared. I wonder if Singaporeans, inclusive of the people who rule us, are generally too thin-skinned to shrug off criticism like water off a duck's back. Afterall, receiving praise on a regular basis does not serve as the best inurement to perceived slight.
It's interesting to hear what Li Ao had to say about Singapore. Whether we agree with him or not is one thing, it doesn't, or at least shouldn't, hurt to listen non-judgmentally to the opinions of a learned outsider. In short, in case you haven't read the newspaper reports, Li Ao reckons that Singapore is a realization of Chinese Legalist philosophy. And while Singapore has reached a significant level of collective achievement, this was at the expense of producing outstanding individuals. More controversially, he adds that while the industry and determination of our ancestors are very much admirable, they had next to no culture (by the Arnoldian definition). As such, their descendents are of poor
zhong- literally 'seed', but can be translated as 'stock' (as the ST did) or 'pedigree'. In essence, the emphasis on the collective over the individual can be attributed to both our heritage and LKY's policies.
If really like that, sad leh. This means that even if the sociopolitical environment changes drastically to espouse individualism, we will still be hampered by our cultural genotype (don't know to what extent the argument about our cultural inferiority is true, but anyone who has compared vernacular Hokkien in Fujian province to local Hokkien, or even Bahasa Melayu as taught in Malaysia to that in Singapore, ought to notice the difference). Instead of studying how we have been shaped by government policies, perhaps we ought to look more deeply at how our peculiar characteristics have necessitated certain political directions.
or All my friends got more money
I'm bored. Surprising, since time has been passing really quickly for me the past few weeks, even though I hadn't been doing much. Research suggests that the subjective perception of time quickens as a function of age. So I must be getting old. If boredom is the pain of acutely-felt existence, then pain ought to remind one of the boredom of chronic existence. Certainly I would have been happy not to exist for a while when I felt as though someone was squeezing my brain tightly for a couple of hours yesterday.
Just as we receive our Progress Packages, Charles Murray's latest book,
In Our Hands: A Plan to Replace the Welfare State, is now available in stores. Murray is of course notoriously co-author of the much-discussed but rarely-read
The Bell Curve, and also the provocative (not necessarily in a good way)
Human Accomplishment. He argues that the American government should just give an equal amount of money, say $10 000, to every adult in the form of a cash grant, regardless of income or housing, in lieu of the existing policy instruments of social welfare. Well, I'm no policymaker, so I'm not in any position to debate the relative merits of the scheme. Just a random thought though: the difference between a few hundred and 10 000 dollars, for me at least, seems to be that you can really do something with the latter (especially if a couple or extended family decide to pool the money together) but not the former. Or maybe I'm just too well-off to regard a few hundred dollars as little more than symbolic or a short-term fix.
Friend: I have no trouble understanding my Indian lecturers. They have consistent accents.
Other friend: What, huh?
F: That means their accents are standard lah. You know what corresponds to what, cos they at least speak proper English. But my lecturer from ____; wah lau eh, cannot even follow what he's saying.
I think I know what my friend was getting at. There is a difference between not being used to an accent and therefore not tolerating it, and plain 'catch no ball' and thus feeling damn pek chek. Even if you live in New York where diverse accents are encountered on a daily basis and are such a nice guy full of love and tolerance for Others, you'll still get at least slightly annoyed by a lecturer whom you initially thought spoke Xhosa throughout the first lesson, until he said something that vaguely reminded you of 'see you next week' at the end. And you need to get an A for this class in order to secure honours. Another person telling you to get used to various accents cos you'll eventually meet people from all round the globe at work probably wouldn't help.
